Digging Up My Jewish Roots in My Grandfather’s Ukrainian Village

My grandfather told me his hometown no longer existed. But I found it—and finally came to appreciate my own heritage.

By David Kalis for Tablet Magazine

Before I left for a tour of the Soviet Union in 1991, I asked my grandfather about the Ukrainian village where he grew up. There’s no use trying to find it, he told me confidently in his deep bellow, it no longer exists.

Yet two years later, I was there, standing inside the dilapidated synagogue in Shepetovka. I stood face-to-face with four elderly men wearing loose-fitting suit coats, slacks, fedoras, and button-down shirts. The lines on their drooping faces were pronounced, their movements tentative, and their eyes curious. Realizing that these men might have had a shared experience with my grandfather, or could have known his family, I asked eagerly if they knew if I had any relatives still in the area.

“Young man, the synagogue you stand in today used to be filled with many worshipping Jews,” one of them told me. “It was a beautiful place with new scrolls, ornate walls, stained glass, and prayer books. You see what has happened? Today, we are a very small community. We once had 40,000 Jews in the region. Now we have maybe 500. There was a long history here, and now it is gone.”

He paused and I looked down, saddened and ashamed at my ignorance. What I had learned of the Holocaust in school was their reality. They had lived through more than I could comprehend. While I had taken my Judaism for granted, these men had struggled to exist as Jews. I took my backpack off and placed it gently on a wooden chair beside me. Suddenly, an unfamiliar feeling of pride, belonging, and Jewish identity overcame me. I was 23, but this was the first time I had ever felt such a connection to my religion.

I had come to Shepetovka hoping to find out more about my grandfather’s life. Instead, I discovered more about my own.

Continue reading.

For Many Orthodox Teens, ‘Half Shabbos’ Is A Way Of Life

Texting on Saturdays seen as increasingly common ‘addiction.’

Steve Lipman for The Jewish Week

At a recent campgrounds Shabbaton sponsored by a local Modern Orthodox high school, the teenage participants broke into small groups after the meals, as is usual, to talk with their friends.

On their cell phones.

Of the 17 students who attended the weekend program, said 17-year-old Julia, a junior at the day school, most sent text messages on Shabbat – a violation of the halachic ban on using electricity in non-emergency situations.

“Only three [of the 17 students] didn’t text on Shabbos,” Julia says. Most did it “out in the open,” sitting at picnic tables. “They weren’t hiding it.”

The students at the Shabbaton were not the exception for their age group. According to interviews with several students and administrators at Modern Orthodox day schools, the practice of texting on Shabbat is becoming increasingly prevalent, especially, but not exclusively, among Modern Orthodox teens.

It’s a literally hot-button issue that teachers and principals at yeshiva day schools, whose academic year ends this week, acknowledge and deal with it in both tacit and oblique ways. For the most part, they extol the virtues of keeping Shabbat rather than chastising those who violate it.

The practice has become so widespread – some say half of Modern Orthodox teens text on Shabbat – that it has developed its own nomenclature – keeping “half Shabbos,” for those who observe all the Shabbat regulations except for texting; “gd Shbs,” is the shorthand text greeting that means good Shabbos.

Not surprisingly, because of texting’s high-tech nature, it is the frequent subject of bloggers and discussion groups on the Internet.

Schools are still looking for ways to deal with the issue, how to recognize the extent of the problem without issuing directives that are likely to be ignored.

Bottom line: The teens who text probably won’t stop.

“It’s a big problem,” says Rabbi Steven Burg, international director of the Orthodox Union’s NCSY youth group. Teens who text on Shabbat are an open secret in their schools and social circles, he says.

 Continue reading.

Fresh Ink Essay Contest Winner: Juliet Freudman

Juliet Freudman, a senior at Great Neck North High School in Great Neck, L.I., for The Jewish Week

You Tell Us We’re The Future, But We’re Also The Present

We are the good, the bad and everything in between. We are our mistakes, our failures and our sins. We are Saturday nights taking selfies with red cups, Monday mornings asleep during first period and Thursday evenings procrastinating on Buzzfeed. We are our addictions to the Internet and our obsessions with Instagram. We spend too much money on Starbucks and too much time on Snapchat. We gossip and we lie. And we would join a revolution for the sweet taste of rebellion. No shame. No regrets. YOLO. We’re teenagers and we’re pretty selfish sometimes.

But we are more than all of that. We are determination, action and endless potential. We are Saturday nights spent bent over textbooks, Monday mornings taking tests at 8 a.m. and Thursday evenings coming home after 11 hours in school. We are more AP classes and extracurricular activities than we can count on one hand. We are the presidents of our high schools, the star athletes and the unbelievable virtuosos. We have loud, controversial opinions and we want everyone to hear them.

We believe we’re invincible ... but what is so wrong with that? What is so wrong with believing that your dreams can come true? We ignore the skepticism and cynicism that seems to come with age, but we are far from ignorant. We are aware of what is going on in the world around us and just because our eyes are glued to our computer screens doesn’t mean we are blind to everyone else. We have passion in our hearts and fire in our bellies. Our faith in ourselves does not result in naïveté to the harsh realities of this world but in determination to make a difference. And don’t underestimate us; we will make a difference. We already are.

You tell us we’re the “future.” But we are also the present. We’re here right now and we’re ready. We are involved in AIPAC, J-Teen Leadership and Write On For Israel, The Jewish Week’s program for teen journalists. At the age of 14, Rebecca Kantar, from Boston, founded Minga, a nonprofit organization that combats child sex trafficking in the United States and the world. In high school, Nittai Malchin, from Palo Alto, Calif., founded One Love Advocates to improve education in communities struggling with destructive or endemic problems, specifically in Haiti. Tatiana Grossman, also from Palo Alto, Calif., created Spread the Words, a foundation that works to increase literacy rates in Africa, and by the time she was 16, she had shipped over 23,000 books to approximately 115 villages. These are only three of many examples of Jewish teenagers who saw a problem and took action.

So yes, we have our faults. We are not perfect, but we will never try to be. Because we are not ashamed. We are proud. As the rapper Ke$sha preaches, “We R Who We R,” and Lady Gaga affirms, “Baby, we were born this way.” Criticize our priorities and question our decisions, but do not underestimate us.

Explaining the Passover Symbols to Teens

by Erica Loop, Demand Media

Passover, the Jewish holiday that marks the Israelites' exodus from Egypt, is much more than matzah balls and gefilte fish. Before sitting down for your Seder, explain the Passover symbols, such as the bitter herbs, lamb shankbone, matzah and charoset, to your teen. Activities to help her better understand the meaning behind these objects will make the holiday more memorable for her and give her a better idea of the significance that this holiday brings.

Age and Maturity

Unlike a toddler or preschooler, who most likely can't fully comprehend the significance of the Passover holiday and its symbols, your teen should have the maturity level to understand what you are explaining to him. According to the University of Delaware's Cooperative Extension's family and Human Development specialists, teens have the ability to think abstractly, understanding and pondering more esoteric concepts such as religion. This cognitive development allows your adolescent to get a grip on the symbolic nature of the Passover Seder plate, and see the items as more than just food.

Parsley or Karpas

While your teen might see the parsley on the Seder plate as garnish, the karpas is actually a symbol that has a few meanings in the Passover context. According to rabbi Jill Jacobs at the My Jewish Learning website, the karpas typically symbolize the way in which the Israelites flourished at the beginning of their time in Egypt. Additionally, this leafy green herb can also symbolize the new buds of the spring season.

Charoset

Charoset, also known as haroset, might look like an odd little pile of nuts and assorted fruit bits to your teen, but she should know that this holiday mixture symbolizes mortar. As you tell your teen the story of Passover, explain to her that it was the Jewish slaves that built many of the buildings that the pharaoh commissioned. The charoset's mortar-like consistency is a symbol that refers back to the Israelites' days of building, before they were freed from the Pharaoh's forced labor.

Continue reading.
For more Passover news, check out our    page.

Anorexia and Shabbat

Campus & Community, The Conspiracy on newvoices.org by Jourdan Stein

Third grade lunch at Solomon Schechter Jewish Day School. All my friends are sitting around eating Cheetos and sharing sandwiches. Me, I’m staring at the clock waiting for the little and the big hand to both land on the twelve so that I can throw the untouched lunch my mother packed me into the trash can. For as long as I can remember I have had an aversion to food, which is funny since almost all of my memories from childhood include food. When I look back and think about holidays I spent surrounded by family, I think about how many Rosh Hashanahs at my zaida’s house I spent saying I don’t like apples and honey, how many Hannukahs I refused to eat latkes, and how many Purims I convinced myself I didn’t like Hamantashen. I don’t remember the discussions we had at the table, but I do remember the anxiety I felt about eating the meal in front of me. I love being Jewish, I have always felt that it is one of things about me that makes me special. But there is another thing about me that has always made me special—anorexia.

These early memories of food and Judaism are just the beginning of a life filled with memories of feeling pride in starvation. Food, or lack of it, has taken me down a long, dark road that is now slowly turning upward. It started with throwing my lunch out in elementary school. Then skipping dinner the 3 nights a week I had dance in middle school. By high school I was eating under 800 calories a day, and by the start of college 500. By the time I sought treatment I was living only on caffeine. I know this sounds implausible to those of you without an eating disorder, but it’s not like people didn’t notice. I lost weight, then when people got too concerned, gained it back only to lose all of it and more again. I honestly have no idea what started my eating disorder. I do, however, know why it took me so long to seek treatment. Anorexia served as a protector for me. I needed nothing and no one. Nobody could hurt me more than I could hurt myself. I created a wall between me and the rest of the world through anorexia. The big problem started, though, in college when starvation was no longer enough to protect me from the world.

Continue reading.

School 'love-bombed' after Nazi graffiti attack

Students whose school was bombarded with Nazi graffiti at the weekend were surprised on Tuesday to find the building had been "love-bombed" by Stockholm well-wishers.

By Oliver Gee for The Local-Sweden's Newspaper in English

Stockholm's Vasa Real school was hit by a Nazi graffiti attack on Sunday night, when unknown assailants sprayed swastikas on the walls, as well as the words "disgusting Jews" and the number 1488, which is a symbol for white power and the Nazi greeting Heil Hitler. The attack left one parent in tears.

On Monday night, members of Sweden's Liberal Party (Folkpartiet) youth wing organized a "love bombing" to counter the offensive Nazi slogans.

"We wanted the pupils at the school to be greeted by love in the morning instead of all the hate they saw on Monday," young Liberal Bawar Esmail told The Local.

"So a group of us got together and cut (out) some heart-shaped paper and put them up on the doors and in the hallways at the school," he explained. "People passing by joined in, and everyone wrote messages for the students."

He explained that the messages were meant to bring comfort to the students, some of whom are as young as 11. The messages contained words such as "Love overcomes hate" and "Love comes in all shapes and colours". Others wrote that there were 1,000 times more people lovers than haters in Sweden.

The move kicked off a hashtag on social media "#1000xFler", which literally means "1,000 times more". It featured in tweets on Tuesday from Democracy Minister Birgitta Ohlsson and Integration Minister Erik Ullenhag, among hundreds of others.

As to why Esmail felt compelled to help, he said the answer was simple.

"I'm an immigrant myself, and racism really frustrates me," he said. "It's easy to get depressed by hateful messages in society."

The Vasa Real school has more than 800 pupils from grades five to nine, when the children are between 11 and 15. At high-school level, there are three classes with Jewish children who study the Swedish curriculum but also study Hebrew and Jewish studies, according to the Vasa Real website.

Meet Miss Israel 2014

18-year-old Mor Maman of Beersheba has been crowed as this year's Miss Israel

By: Dalia Ben Ari for ShalomLife

The first Ethiopian-born woman to be crowned Miss Israel, Yityish (Titi) Aynaw, bid farewell to her crown Tuesday evening and handed it over to the winner of the 2014 beauty pageant, 18-year-old Mor Maman of Beersheba.

Maman, who studies computer graphics, will soon enlist with the Israel Air Force. She comes from a family of beautiful women: Her mother, Ilana Maman, was once crowned Miss Beersheba.

"Participating in the Miss Israel contest is a dream come true for me," she said when she registered for the competition.

"Four years ago, our life changed. My mother fell down and lost her memory as a result of the fall. It was simply erased. I arrived at the hospital and she didn't know who I was. I was angry at the entire world, I began neglecting myself, and then my father had a heart attack.

"But I quickly understood that I had no other choice but to lift myself up. From a spoilt middle child I became responsible – cleaning, preparing food without neglecting my studies. When I graduated with honors and got on the stage to accept the certificate, everyone applauded. Fortunately, our house is functioning again and we're happy."

The beautiful Maman grew up as an overweight child. "Following the overweight, I began developing health problems," she said. "At the age of 13, while my parents were in Morocco for two months, I decided I wanted to be like everyone else. No one could stop me. For two months I mainly ate salads, did a lot of physical activity and lost 30 kilos as a result. I have not been overweight since then. I taught myself to eat right, and I exercise a lot.

"I started a Facebook group which helps girls who want to lose weight without falling to anorexia, Heaven forbid. When the group members are having a hard time, I give them hope. I tell them to follow their dream and not to give up. If I succeeded – anyone can do it."

 Continue reading.