Orthodox Jewish high schools in the United States try to balance
concerns for their reputation and their students, as growing number of
teens openly identify as gay.
By Debra Nussbaum Cohen for Haaretz

NEW
YORK — Though he had lots of friends, Amram Altzman still felt alone at
Ramaz High School. As a 16-year-old sophomore at the modern-Orthodox
Manhattan institution, Altzman worried about what people would think,
whether they would accept him, if they knew he was gay. “Being gay and
being Orthodox just wasn’t something that was talked about. It was
isolating,” says Altzman, now 19 and in college.
He told his
closest friends first, then his parents. Before long, almost everyone at
Ramaz knew that he was gay. While there were a few negative comments,
Altzman felt accepted overall. At home in Mill Basin, Brooklyn, however,
it was a different story. There, comments were so routinely hostile
that his parents moved the family to a different community, in order to
take Amram and his younger siblings out of an environment they felt
could alienate their sons from Judaism altogether. And while Altzman
says that he was embraced by both his friends and his family, he wishes
that Ramaz handled the issue of homosexuality differently, framing it
not as a sin and a chosen lifestyle, but rather as an identity.
Like
a growing number of students, the topic of homosexuality is beginning
to come out at Orthodox high schools in the United States. Until very
recently, the norm for gay Orthodox Jews was to come out in college or
later. But for a few years now there has been a marked shift. Students
at Orthodox high schools who identify as gay are increasingly pushing to
not only make sure that they are not overtly bullied, but also wholly
accepted and able to explore what it means to be both gay and Orthodox.
Now that same-sex marriage is legal in 18 U.S. states, and American
attitudes are becoming, in many places, far more accepting, the
challenge to Orthodox high schools is growing.
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